Lived Experience Forum

[Eden1919]

I dont know how exactly this all started but this last week i have been questioning if my psychologist really knows me or not i guess it was after a comment they made and now idk what to think about anything like if they dont really understand/know me then everything they have said and all their advice and stuff is wrong or not right and i cant trust it and if that is true then certain things they have said and told me are all things i cant trust and if that is true then all the other stuff that was happening before must have been real/true which means i am in danger and people might not be people after all and that that deity might actually be trying to hurt me and that i need the meds out of me because they are just trying to trick me and i cant trust them and that would explain why someone has been taking thoughts out of my head and ugh idk it is complicated and i just dont know what to think anymore like i am trying to keep it together but my foundations feel shaky and idk where to go from here. 

sorry this is so long and rambly i need to sleep but i am too stressed to do the things i need to do to make that happen and yeah idk everything is very messy at the moment. 

[simplesymbol]

Hi @Eden1919, It looks like you are going through an ajdustment period atm and trying to make sense of things as best as possible.  Please do keep us in the loop of what's happening for you and be safe.  We may follow up with you later in the morning just to check-in and see how you are going.

[Eden1919]

I am still really stressed and I didn’t get to sleep and I feel awful and I don’t know what to do with myself and I have so many things I need to do but can’t get done and I am just I don’t even know I am trying so hard to make everything work but things keep falling apart and idk what to do everything is just too much right now. 

[Lost9]

Hi @Eden1919 ,

I have been lost, confused and frightened before trying to make sense of everything when nothing made sense.  I had high anxiety and kept hearing awful voices. What helped me was several good nights sleep. Perhaps you can talk to your doctor about it. He/she might be able to suggest something to help you sleep. Look after yourself and stay safe,

lost9

[Eden1919]

@Lost9  i dont see my doctor for another few weeks i am trying to sleep really even when i manage to get to bed though i have just been tossing and turning and it is just hard i am sorry you had to go through something similar. 

I am still really stressed and it is getting worse and idk what to do like i am trying really hard to distract myself but it isnt working very well and idk i am just struggling a lot. 

[Sphinxly]

Hi @Eden1919, I just wanted to pop in and say hello and let you know i'm here this evening. Sorry to hear things are really hard right now. Sounds like it's even difficult to engage in some strategies. 

Do you find it helpful to connect with someone in a helpline and have them sit with you?

Lifeline 13 11 14 

Suicide Call Back Service 1300 659467 

Here with you,

Sphinxly

[Lost9]

@Eden1919 

All you can do is try your best. Maybe a warm milk and honey before you go to bed might help.  I guess you are feeling exhausted by now. I was when I went through something similar.  Perhaps you could ring your doctor and get an earlier appointment?  I wish I could offer you some quick fix advice but I can't think of anything else that could help. Reaching out on this site was a really good idea. Hopefully you won't feel so alone. There are some that have been in your situation and made it through to better times. Just hang in there. I'm hoping things will be better for you soon. 
lost9

[Eden1919]

@Sphinxly  I tried a helpline but it was too hard to talk to them and i had to stop early. 

[Sphinxly]

@Eden1919 fair enough, i'm glad you tried. What have you been doing in the last couple of hours? I hope you've found something to distract yourself with.

Here with you,

Sphinxly

[Eden1919]

@Lost9  thanks, idk about the warm milk i dont really like warm drinks except tea but that has cafeine in it so idk. i also cannot get an eairler appointment with my doctor 😕 thanks anyway though. 

@Sphinxly  I had to do my washing and it took me ages but i have so many other things i have to do as well today and i have only done that. everything is kind of a mess.