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Kombibob
Contributor

The Gift of Depression.

“Simply Thank you”

 

Introduction:

After more than twenty years of fighting depression, many psychologists and many psychiatrists and so many cycles of medication, this simple personal insight brought me home!

 

To all those beautiful people who have suffered from depression I would like to say “Thank you, Simply Thank you” for doing such a wonderful job. Thank you for being such beautiful and courageous messengers , such shining beacons!

 

I hear your pain , I have felt your pain, and now I hear your message and I hear it loud and clear for your message is simply the pain of humanity and the way it has to live now. The way we are living now is so wrong, so wrong, there is so little human-ness left in the way we live. We need to change, and we need to change now! So now relax in the knowing of a job well done, your message has been heard, that there has never been anything wrong with you, you are simply a gifted messenger!

 

I know that place you go to; that deepening, darkening tunnel, which you shuffle down with trembling knees, and your body full of terror and panic. I know that place you go to, where the tunnel ends, where your bare feet are on solid ground but your toes are dangling over nothingness, an empty abyss, and it is so dark and frightening. Then dimly just ahead there is a feint outline, misty at first, that slowly forms into a shape, a doorway, and it's only about five feet away.

 

And I know that moment when you are rocking on the balls of your feet, trying to decide wether to jump or not. “ I wonder if I can leap across in one bound or shall I take a few steps back and take a running jump?”

Then for some reason, you stop rocking and plant your heels firmly back on the ground, and from somewhere deep, deep inside you grab hold of something primal, something essential and you turn around facing back the way you came and take a deep breath. I thank you in this moment for choosing to return to life rather than taking the leap of death.

All ahead is blackness and you squint your eyes and then dimly perceive a minute spec of light, so small you are not sure it is real at all. So you slowly retrace your steps, and that little spec of light gets bigger and bigger as you shuffle fearfully upwards.

You are heading back to the light and it is your light, and it is getting brighter and brighter until it's the colour of Cornish Ice cream and you can feel it's warmth enfold you, and suddenly you are out of the tunnel, back in the gallery of life.

So you take your light and sit down, and relax and look back at where you came from. The tunnel is gone, the entrance has been bricked over, then plastered over and some artists have painted a mural over the place honouring the purpose of the tunnel.

 

You are Home, you are safe! Well done and Simply Thank you!

 

Namaste' Bob and Barnaby Eden. Woof.

2 REPLIES 2

Re: The Gift of Depression.

@Kombibob 

 

Thank you for sharing this.  It's truly beautiful.

 

I suspect that we who have been diagnosed with MI are not really the problem, but rather, the solution.  Just because we are not like the "normal", doesn't make us wrong.  We are made to feel that way and hence the pain.  But we just see the world differently.  We experience things differently.  And society doesn't like different.  Society doesn't understand it.  And anything people don't understand, they label "wrong".

 

But what if we are what is right with the world?

 

What if we are are shining a light on what needs to change?

 

Personally I'm tired of being told I'm the problem.  That I am different and strange and somehow unacceptable to the world.  Just because I don't enjoy the things everyone else does.  Just because my needs and wants and desires are different from those of others.  That doesn't make me wrong.  That makes me special.  I should be appreciated and treasured.  And so should we all!!

 

 

 

P.S... and whilst I was just reading this really heartfelt message to my husband, he started typing a reply to someone on the computer.  And right after we had a discussion about him not being a good listener.... OMG!!!!!

Re: The Gift of Depression.

This is beautiful. Thank you! Yes I believe in depressive realism, that we are carrying/showing the wounds of our society at large

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