useless useless judgemental chat operator

[fkthis]

Absolutely agree with Ur overhaul ideas ! I understand why it is the way it is and like U say ... It's not gonna change anytime soon but would impact every single area positively.

My trial starts on 16 th of Dec also my birthday gahhh. I need to write victim impact statement n everytime I start it just comes out as a mix of unorganised emotions.
Basically by my questions I mean legal system n judicial. I have complaint about the way things were handled n 2 months I've been calling to try to get an answer as to why it was allowed to happen . Still nothing I was handballed from victim support to court police , to prosecutor to detective ... All of them had nothing except ... No it's not allowed but we can't or won't police it either . So basically I got no one in my corner even the ppl who r supposed to be. N still claiming to be . Incites much hope... Not lol

[fkthis]

In relation to Ur horror at the medical cal staff telling to go and do it. I did in that case n she pretended it never happened so I was the crazy one.

TW: Institutional trauma/mistreatment, mention of self-harm

Content/trigger warning

And the other one that stands out was a paramedic(who saw me hysterical and clearly hiding n shaking trying to put the thing to my skin after being told to go home from hospital) who ripped the tool out of my hand n while injuring my palm quite badly too he told me to FK off n do it off the hospital grounds ... So I did . I obvs sat where I collapsed across the road waiting for a taxi n was self-harming [edited by moderator] when he drove past in ambulance and made eye contact n shook his head . Duty of care problems is right .

[Jynx]

@fkthis just letting you know I made a couple small edits to your post to help keep it in line w the Community Guidelines - namely we don't allow graphic descriptions or mentions of specific self-harm methods. I added a trigger warning too - if you have any questions or concerns about this feel free to let us know! Either here or via team@saneforums.org

Ohhhhh yuck... December is SUCH a long wait!! And on your bday too, that's a cruel lil twist of fate. And yeah, getting bounced around from service to service like that is bound to leave you feeling hurt, frustrated, and completely let down. 

I'm truly sorry to hear that you've been through these things. Sounds like you've had some particularly bad luck, and that there's been a multitude of failures (of the system, not you haha) all stacked and compounding to result in an immense amount of stress. No one deserves that. 

I am about to log off so I'll say goodnight! Chat to you next time 😊

[chibam]

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@fkthis wrote:
I'm just not having much faith in the depts that r supposed to help . Across the board . How do U trust that people r doing their job ... When time and time again in many different depts Ur proved unfortunately right. How r we expected to just accept that . I can't.

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I think you'll find that's fairly common, people having lost faith in various institutions that are supposed to help.

I certainly have.

And for all the multitude of inquiries that have been held into these systems, the government never seems to take any real interest in actually fixing the problems. I don't live in Victoria but I've been told that things are as bad as ever with their mental health system, following that big royal inquiry that was supposed to change everything.

I don't know what we're supposed to do about it.

[chibam]

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@fkthis wrote:
I've been calling to try to get an answer as to why it was allowed to happen . Still nothing I was handballed from victim support to court police , to prosecutor to detective ... All of them had nothing except ... No it's not allowed but we can't or won't police it either .

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I don't know the specifics of your situation, but if the questions your asking pertain to an ongoing court case, then the reason why you might not be able to get answers to them might be because the people are not legally aloud to talk about the matter, or because their lawyers have advised them to not talk about it outside of court.

I know you strike that frequently in the media - reporters and/or public figures saying that they can't talk about certain details because their associated with an ongoing court case.

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@fkthis wrote:
 I get first rated with all these support services etc because I find they do alot of fluffing about and not alot of useful information. Ive asked specific questions n never gotten anything close to an answer n I didn't think I'd be the first to be in the situation ....so how can no one have answers .

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I had a similar experience with my therapists. For me, it felt like the woman knew the answers to my questions but was deliberately withholding them, no matter how much I tried to appease her.

I don't know if you've ever heard about a concept called "the golden rule of therapy"? I heard it mentioned a couple times, but I've also encountered plenty of people who are involved with the mental health system who claim they've never heard of it. So for all I know it may be more of an urban legend then an actual rule governing the mental health system...

But anyways, this supposed "golden rule" basically states that therapists aren't aloud to give their patients any real assistance with their problems, nor meaningful advice on how to fix them. Basically, it's an instruction that therapists are obliged to sit on the sideline and leave the patient to fix everything all by themself, without even any meaningful instructions.

It would certainly explain a lot of my experiance with the mental health system. But whether or not most or all therapists actually play by this rule, I have no idea.

[MJG017]

@chibamI think this happens with so many government inquiries... spend a bunch of money to find out the issues... the issue is not enough funding... case quietly closed!

I get there's not enough money for everything to be funded to the extents they should be but priorities seem to be way out of whack.  Money wasted in far too many ways then not spent where it's needed most.

[MJG017]

@fkthisI think we've all experienced how "unfit" the system can be and how much it needs a massive overhaul... ie., much more funding!  It's frustrating enough for me now that I've used my 10 subsidised visits I get for they year, those haven't helped but what am I supposed to do now with costs they way they are?!  It's hard enough for me so I can only image how difficult it is for you!  That's probably not even true... I probably can't even imagine it.  It's obvious from what you've written just how overwhelmed, frustrated, angry, stressed (I could go on and on) you are!!  Any you have every right to be.  The whole system is letting you down so very badly.

I wish I could write something to help you but I just don't know.  I do know that I find it helpful, for me, talking to people here so we are here in your corner and happy to listen to you and do what we can to help you through.  So keep letting up know how you're going.  

I've had no experience with having to write a victim impact statement, but it seems to me that what you've written here could easily be copied and pasted as your statement.  Isn't this statement supposed to describe how you've been affected mentally, physically, emotionally??  It's seems you've described that pretty well here.  Maybe someone with more experience with this can shed some more light on it.

[chibam]

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@MJG017 wrote:

...but priorities seem to be way out of whack.  Money wasted in far too many ways then not spent where it's needed most.

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This is so much more relevant then anybody gives it credit for. As you say, "not enough money!" is the age-old catch-cry we hear time and time again (mostly because these inquiries insist on talking mainly to the spokespeople of organizations, and not to the suffering individuals at anything more then a token level), but whatever truth there may be to that claim is grossly exaggerated.

The problem isn't lack of money so much as it's money being wasted.

I endured treatment that cost thousands of dollars and got nothing for it, when a therapist who was actually committed to helping me probably could've completely sorted out all my problems in no more then 6 sessions. Even at $140 a session, that comes out at less then $900 - a mere fraction of what my family and the government actually paid for my completely useless treatment, not to even mention the emotional/psychological toll it took on me.

Just using myself as a case study, the problem most definitely is not a lack of funding. It's a lack of the therapists actually delivering any value for money.

This is why it always gets my back up when people start talking about lack of money being the main problem. Until government and the general public understand what the real nature of the problem is, we've got no chance of anything actually getting fixed.

*Edit: That $140 I mentioned is based on the sort of prices we actually paid at the time. I appreciate that the average cost of therapy has almost certainly ballooned well beyond that since then.

[Ravencroft]

@fkthis As a newbie to this forum I also wanted to add my support.  I have had some truely demoralising experiences with GPs and mental health services and I actualy find these mental health forums have helped me more than any therapist or GP has ever done. I guess it's because they have been through the same sh*t we've been through. 

Persevere with the helplines, sometimes I have had to politely end the call as I knew instinctively they were not the right person for me.  I find the ones that say "I'm so glad you rang today" are the more empathetic.

I have Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and I'm pretty messed up but still hanging in there - sort of. 

Just wanted u to know that I really understand what you're going through.  It can leave you feeling like a number rather than an individual.

Take care

Ravencroft

[fkthis]

Nothing lol we r supposed to become statistics for their lil reports that no one reads or cares about. At least no one that will do anything .
What r U supposed to do when criminal, judicial, medical, community systems all of them r just words n corrupt af. If we all got better Jesus where would all these ppl employed in mental health go ....